the Untrodden path

6 word story

2009-03-04T10:07:00.000-08:00

"Susie leaves Calvin, Calvin-headed cubs."

that is my first attempt at a six word story.

check this out -

http://www.sixwordstories.net

gee, should i?

2009-02-25T18:28:00.000-08:00

You enter this big hall and see a giant circular table in the middle. A few people are seated around it. You take a seat, subtly glancing at who the others are. They see you, you see them. You wonder whether you should greet them, perhaps tell that casual hi.. the usual small talk; You invariably end up holding the newspaper in front of you looking busy. You eventually get bored of that and plug in your ipod, wearing your fav bands' tee. After killing time for quite a bit, you actually start work... and DING! an irritating old aquaintence starts talking to you. Thats when you contemplate taking that dingy old room, overlooking the hall, next time.

150 million people go through this everyday!

Everytime I sign into gmail and see those little green/red buttons with names next to them I cant help but wonder how it would be, if it was a real place...

Coffee with self

2008-01-18T05:41:00.000-08:00

Well...well.. it was a hot Saturday afternoon, and for some strange reason, I decided to get myself an even hotter cup of coffee. It was relatively empty when I stepped into the coffee shop, and hence the choice of seat was mine. I found a cozy couch at the corner of the shop, almost like a beanbag. I sank myself into it. It felt great! I dint bother calling the waiter to take my order, as I dint want anything/anyone to spoil my moment with the exceedingly comfortable beanbag!

After yawing and stretching for almost 73 seconds, I realised that I had forgotten the whole purpose of my being there. I did not want to actually make notes of what I saw and then blog about it. I just wanted to observe and have a good time and blogging I thought, would follow (and now i can safely say that it has); anyways, five minutes into it, the waiter appeared with a pleasing smile and handed the menu over. I politely handed it back without opening and said " One Mochachino please" as I had decided what I wanted to have even before stepping in. As he was about to leave I called him and said " Please take your time ". He gave me a curious look and left. I was sure i was going to be the topic of conversation(read mocking) for the waiters for some time. I dint care though.. Because every time I go to a coffee shop they take time to bring my order...but I dint want to take a chance this time with Mr.Murphy as I needed some time.

Just then, a couple entered. A couple in the sense, a guy and a girl, I was not sure whether they were a "couple". It would be interesting to find out though. They sat in the table right opposite mine... and for all the male readers of this blog, YES the girl was really really pretty, and YES the big muscular guy accompanying the pretty girl did look like her loving caring brother. I was trying to mentally add conversation to their actions as I was unable to hear them. I had real fun doing that, especially when the couple started discussing the latest trends in synthetic fertilizers for the development of agro-based products in South-East Asia.

Later, a bunch of loud teenagers came in. They were laughing their wits out from the moment they entered. It took me back to the good old school days; the days we dint care about a thing in the world. When the brief phase of nostalgia was ended by the waiter placing my hot mochachino on the table, I realised that I had failed to notice a few women in their thirties enter the coffee shop. It did not require a PhD to conclude that they were fresh from burning a ultra-large sized hole in their husband's pocket( NO, they were not working women.... I can tell).

By this time, I was thoroughly enjoying my coffee and observing every one. All this while, I was being very careful as there is a very thin line between observing and ogling; but unfortunately for me, most thought I was doing the latter. The pretty girl, instead of frowning, gave this "oh you got stood up on a coffee date you loser!" kind of look. The shopping women gang gave me a similar look, and that was when I faked an SMS to look busy. The teen gang was completely oblivious to my existence, which for some weird reason,I was thankful for. Then, I asked the waiter for the cheque. The way he grinned while giving the bill was suggestive of "Hahaha you got stood up!". I paid the exact amount and I almost fled!! Now I realised what Cafe' Coffee Day's Tag line really meant - " a lot can happen over a cup of coffee " Believe me!

It is over :(

2007-07-06T09:41:00.000-07:00

It is over! I never ever thought it would be, but it is.

After three years of absolute fun with her, I had to move on; and I am not ashamed to admit that I am completely responsible for it.My best Valentine's day was spent with her!! She was magical! Man, everytime I think of the good times we had, I feel sad; and Uhhh she got soo hot at times, I just could'nt keep her down!!!! There were times when my friends used to visit me just to check her out, and that gave me a wierd high. She was the talk of the town. She was definitely a showpiece!!
I spent a LOT of money on her, she was high maintenance. I knew all this very well, but I just could'nt say anything as she was the only one who could keep me satisfied.
But now, everything has changed. I took her to the limits, but she just could'nt satisfy me anymore, I had to let her go...

It was really hard, but i did what i had to.......

Yes, my ATI Radeon 9800 XT Graphics accelerator ceased to function on saturday 9th June, 2007 @ 10AM.
I got it on Feb 14th 2004, it was the best graphics card available in the market.
That graphics card alone cost Rs.32,000 when a whole PC did'nt cost that much. The crazy gamer that I was , I just could not resist buying it. It produced THE ultimate visual/gaming experience then.
and yes, it got really hot and it needed separate cooling fans to cool it down;
and yes, it was high maintenance as i had to buy a more powerful 500W SMPS because it required a separate power connector. and yes, it was the talk of the town and my friends came home to check the graphic performance out! and yes, it kept me happy if not 'satisfied'! I am completely responsible for it as I tried overclocking it last week.
It has stopped working now and i have to let it go.
May its soul Rest In Peace!

PS: How to use LJ cut in Blogspot??

The concept of CUTTING

2007-07-06T09:37:00.000-07:00

STATUTORY WARNING : CIGARETTE SMOKING IS MORE INJURIOUS TO A NON-SMOKING YOU THAN TO YOUR FRIEND WHO IS SMOKING RIGHT NEXT TO YOU. HENCE, SMOKE AWAY TO GLORY!

First of all, I am not a chain smoker, nor am i controlled by cigarettes. I am the kind who smokes occasionaly when my friends smoke...no..this is not called peer pressure. "i Hang out with them anyway; instead of harming myself by smoking passively, why not do it the right way" is my philosophy..And by the way,my new years resolution was not to smoke. After that went down the drain like the election manifesto of Indian Politicians, here i am writing about my filter-tip-buddy and the concept of cutting.

Let me try and do this the Wiki way!.. here goes....

Cutting - kat'eeng

Cutting is a term popularly used in the South Indian city of Chennai by its youth to define sharing of a cigarette/Beedi/joint among peers. This sharing is usually due to one of the following reasons:

1.Impoverishment of few or all of the peers involved.

2.When the number of cigarettes/Beedis/Joints smoked by one of the peers, exceeds the self-imposed limit and the feeling of guilt sets in, but the urge to smoke gets the better of one of them

3.When the peer group wants to symbolise everlasting(ironic aint it) friendship.

4.To reduce the probability of getting caught with a cigarette in hand, by relatives, parents and girlfriends' friends. (I dint mention girlfriend on purpose,because i assumed one would know the whereabouts of one's girlfriend and would stay nowhere within a 3KM radius of that whereabout).

A few experts in the field of cutting are blatanly against point #2 as they say that there is an idle time between two consecutive drags when one smokes a full cigarette; Whereas when Cutting, one takes a drag and passes the cigarette on to his peer almost immediately. This compensates the idle time of the former, thereby enabling a cutter to increase the chances of getting lung cancer as effectively as a normal smoker would.

Types of Cutting

There are various sports in cutting, the popular among these are :

The F16 : This is where the peer group forms a circle, and keeps the the dragged smoke in ones lungs till the cigarette/beedi/joint completes one full round and comes back to them. The ones to blow the smoke out are eliminated from the elite circle.

Last man standing : This is a normal form of cutting where the person to stub the cigarette sponsors the next 20s pack for the group. The misers that people are, end up smoking the filter and to pass it on to the next person, just to save that 80/- and end up paying in lakhs for chemo.

External Links

* http://www.shortcuttoimpotency.com/

*http://www.wannadieyoung.com/

*http://www.cutting-central.com/

The NOSEant

2007-07-06T09:11:00.000-07:00

Warning: Human beings with crazy quotient of anything below 15 on a scale of 10 are advised to stay away from this blog.

There is something fundamentally wrong with the concept of using deodorants,room freshners, shoe spray thingie etc. I mean, think about it, are the room, the human body,and the shoe the only sources of foul olfaction. This problem should be dealt with at the receiving end, namely the NOSE. That is a one stop solution to all our stinkin problems. After a lot of analysis, i have arrived at this solution. There should be something like a cologne, that can be applied just under our nose.Something that would smell nice all the time. Lets call it the nose-ant.

Here are a few practical advantages of using a nose-ant:

1. You can choose the smell you like, that way you do not have to worry about the idiot next to you using a really strong and head-ache-inducing-i-wanna-chokeyoutodeath kinda cologne.

2. You forget to use nose-ant, you suffer. Unlike the case of deodorants(yeah i believe in bad karma)

3. You can overtake an ONYX garbage lorry with confidence.

4. You wouldnt have to smell anything bad ever again.

Now,I know what you're thinking, what if i want to smell something nice? say nature, the rain. Well you can use a neutralizer for that, then smell the rain,you can always apply the nose-ant back. Its just like wearing a helmet when you are riding a bike, and you occasionally remove it to have that 'wind in your hair' feeling!

All this time we have been trying to protect ourselves from rain by trying to hold an insanely huge water resistant Sheet in the sky instead of using an umbrella.

The T9 Blunder

2007-07-06T09:08:00.000-07:00

I have been pretty busy with work lately, and here comes the breather. This happened to a friend of mine a few months back and that was the day, he (and eventually, i) bid a permanent farewell to Rajini-style-no-looking-at-the-screen type of messaging. Here is what happened, when Shreya ( name changed for the heck of it ) messaged him.

shreya: hey da, whats up..what u doin?

he : Nothin, me jus picked up pink panther from the store....gotta be great

Sh : WTH?? what crap..wat is with u

he : wat? its supposed to be really nice, i'll lend them to you, and u decide how it is. my frnd said twas really good

sh : ur a sicko..wat is with u.. goodbye..

He : But shreya...... why...

(No reply)....

Our hero could not comprehend what was happening, Shreya was mad at him for no apparent reason; And so, he decided to read the sent messages to analyse what might have offended her..Then..he saw his own message that embarassed him to the very core, so much that he did'nt message anyone for a very long time.....

PS : If you are still wondering what is wrong with that message, try typing the word in italics in ur phone with T9 on

Top 5 Desperate Acts!

2007-07-06T09:07:00.000-07:00

Top five (extremely desperate) things men whom i know (very well) have done for women...

Second year of college, Mr.X has an infatuation on a girl who is a friend of Mr.Y. The girl mentions casually over phone that she needs some book and Mr.X without the slightest hesitation swears that he has the book with him right now. Mr.Y , the sweet guy that he is, arranges for the book from some friend, and Mr.X gladly rides 30Km around the city and delivers the book at the girls' doorstep within 2 hours of that phone call. All for that 5 minutes of meeting her.

It was the tenth grade and he was insanely in love with his classmate (he still is). His lady love used to come by bi-cycle to school. Even though his house was so close to the school that, one can practically hear him pee if one listens intently, he would come only by bi-cycle; And would time his journey to perfection that, he and his love reach at the exact same instant; just for that "hi" to be exchanged!

It was the 9th Grade and He had a huge crush on her. Just to increase the probability of running into her, he joined an art class that was conducted in the same building that she lived in, even though he had absolutely no idea what the class was all about.

It was the eleventh grade, and a certain very-cute junior was in class 10.knowing nothing else to do, he actually went into the lab, searched for her record-Notebook, and flicked it. Now that her record had been taken hostage, he calls her up and informs her that her record notebook is with him and asked her meet him to get the record back!!!!!!!

and now for the mother of all Comedies

It was the first year of college and he had been madly in love with her from 7th Std. She had come to town for a couple of days and decided to call him 2 hours before her train's departure.

She: Hey, im leaving in a coupla hours, just wanted to say bye before i leave.

He: Cool... when does it leave?

She : 10PM

* and now for the biggest act of desperation ever....

He: Hey what an unbelievable co-incidence!! my train leaves at 10:15PM, will meet u there... bye

This guy actually rode down to the railway station with an empty air-bag ,memorized some train Name and number that left at around 10:15 from the departure screen to make it authentic and met her for a few minutes. :)

Wonder when women will start doing such crazy stuff!

Rockvan Theory of Pizza Relativity

2007-07-06T09:03:00.000-07:00

There is a theory put forward by a prominent scientist Dr.Reignaunt RockVan called The Theory Of Pizza Relativity. Dr.RockVan, in a state of extreme inebriation came up with this ground-breaking theory, and believes that ones' true genius comes out only in such a state.

When asked about this theory, Dr.Rockvan said that it is a very simple and straight forward one that can be applied to any being on this planet. It is believed to be in the Psychology genre. Many well-known psychologists have branded this theory a "Master Piece" as it defines the characteristics of human behaviour in a never-before manner.

The postulates of the theory are as follows: Dr.Rockvan's Exact words were

"Machaan.... Every Person in this planet is like a Pizza; The base remains the same, just the toppings are different"

According this, Dr.Rockvan claims himself to be a "Margherita" as he is plain and simple in appearance, but has a very pleasing personality (self-proclaimed).

Further research in this field leads us to the following conclusions,

Michael Schumacher - Thin crust Garden Veg pizza.

Riya Sen - Spicy Paneer-Chilli Pizza

Lalu Prasad - Mushroom Pizza (left in the open for thirteen days)

Adnan Sami - Bacon Double Cheeseburger Pizza

Pamela Anderson - Stuffed Cheese-burst Pizza

Dr.RockVan himself is sure of winning a Nobel Prize. When inquired about his surety of winning the prize, he said that he distinctly remembers Alfred Nobel giving a 'thumbs Up' from his grave the moment this theory was postulated.

My First Blog

2007-07-06T08:45:00.000-07:00

Hey there!
this is officially my first post on blogspot; I am just going to copy-paste the entries I had posted earlier on my (ex-)company's intranet Blog. ciao!